Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Oblivion, thy name is Roommate.

Yesterday, I cleaned ALL THE THINGS.

I go on cleaning binges once in a (very long) while, and when I get started, I just keep going. I got through the dishes, counter, stove, sweeping and was halfway through scrubbing the floor when my roommate woke up.

Roommate: Wow, you're amazing!

Me: I'm cleaning!

Roommate: You're amazing!

Me: Could you contribute, by perhaps taking the bottles to the bottle depot, since you have a car and that would suck on my bike?

Roommate: Sure! I'm going out anyways.

Excellent start to the day. It continued with laundry, vacuuming, putting roommates stuff in a pile, cleaning my room and my bathroom.

Then I was free. Went out for dinner with friends. It was nice.

Fast forward to 10pm. I get home.

Me: Hi Roommate! Wow, what smells like burning?

Roommate: It shouldn't smell like burning, I only put it in 5 minutes ago...

Me: Are you...cooking??

Roommate: Yeah it's a pizza a bought a while back and had in the freezer. Would you like some?

Me: Oh. No thanks. Just ate.

Roommate: By the way, great job cleaning! Everything looks awesome!

Skip ahead a few more hours to this morning.

I get up, go to the kitchen to make my breakfast. And there are things. All over my counter.

Now it's not as though there was a huge mess or anything, but it just happened to be spread out over all the available space: a cutting board covered in crumbs and knife beside the stove, a plate and cup beside the sink. A little plastic tab seal that you pull out of a new juice container in the middle of the other counter. And a loaf of bread (which is not unusual) and carton of eggs (which is...especially in summer) on the other side.

Now, it's not as though this is all completely terrible. I just can't comprehend how someone could comment so enthusiastically on all my cleaning and then forget all these....things! All over the place!

Of course, since Roommate only seems to cook about once a month, I guess it might be pretty easy...

Irony. Ur doin it right.

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